Sydney will always be my hometown. But I want to fall in love with it again. For quite a few years now I’ve found it frustrating, brittle, unyielding. Strangled by never-ending construction and weighed down with an ever-hardening heart.
There are still wonderful things about Sydney that I look forward to coming back to. The harbour, occasionally marvellous bouts of artistic joy (when i can afford to go to shows), beautiful restaurants, my loving church, my great friends, my brother.
I won’t miss the feeling that I don’t fit in the Sydney lifestyle mould, even as I am convinced that doesn’t matter at all. It’s been a long time since I knew the best places to go and enjoyed going out til all hours. I’m not worried about having limited places to go in Launceston because I have all these places to go now and I don’t.
Right now I’m sitting in a cute bar in the city that I had no idea existed, at my brother’s suggestion (how does he find these places?! Oh that’s right. Lifelong hospitality worker). See he’s the sort of person who needs the city, who knows where to go, who thrives on the noise and the vibrancy, who was angered by the lockout laws that didn’t affect me in the slightest. My constitution changed sometime in my late 20s and I started to look for quiet places. Every now and again I like spending time in a place like this but I don’t need it.
Well he’s here now. Time for our last drinks together before Christmas.